Snow Swept Moors: A Highland Winter Collection Page 5

  “Aye, my lady.”

  When Maggie and Logan left, Freya settled into the chair next to the bed and took Anita’s hand in hers. “I’ll be right here. Ye need only squeeze my hand if ye need anything at all, my lady.”

  Anita nodded and squeezed the young woman’s hand before closing her eyes. Truthfully, she was exhausted.

  As she relaxed into sleep, images of Christmases when she was a girl flitted through her mind. Her parents had always made things so wonderful. She was an only child—not by design, simply by sad chance. Her parents were married the year after her dad returned from serving in Europe in World War II and her mother became pregnant almost immediately. They wanted a big family but it wasn’t to be. As far as she knew, her mother never conceived again. It was possible that she had miscarriages, but that wasn’t the sort of thing her mother ever spoke about. But because of this, they considered Anita their miracle and lavished their attention on her. Christmases were particularly magical.

  They became the Three Musketeers. She remained close to them their whole lives. It wasn’t that long ago that she had lost them. Oh, Agnes, if you can, tell them how much I miss them. With that thought she drifted to sleep.

  Chapter 5

  Thursday, December 25, 1281

  Castle Carr

  When Anita woke the next morning it had once again been to the realization that she was helpless. She had lost control of her bladder in the night and was wet and chilled. She had to be washed and dressed like a child. This was harder than she’d imagined. But then Logan carried her down to the great hall where Maggie helped make her comfortable on her litter, and as the day progressed, she knew everything she suffered was absolutely worth it.

  She hadn’t awakened for the early morning Mass of the Shepherds, but went with the family and clan to the Mass of the Divine Word later in the morning. The morning was clear and the sun made the deep blanket of snow glitter. She had her first look at the castle in daylight and was awed. It looked like something from a fairytale. She tried to burn the image into her memory because she was certain she’d never see anything like it again.

  When they returned to the great hall after Mass, the celebration started with a huge, lavish feast. Her family surrounded her, seeing to her slightest need. Logan was at her side much of the day as were Davina, Maggie and the children. There had also been a constant stream of Agnes’s friends who entertained her and reminisced with her.

  When the feast was cleared, minstrels entertained and the dancing started. They moved Anita’s litter so she could see everything. Even though she couldn’t speak—in fact she could barely move—it didn’t matter. She was simply present, soaking it all in, making memories. The laughter, the singing, the crackling of the fire, the flickering candlelight. The aromas of roasted boar, hot spiced wine and fresh bread. The feel of a friendly hand holding hers or a sleeping child curled close. It was a glorious Christmas celebration, unlike any Anita had ever experienced.

  Nor will I ever have this again. A lump rose in her throat at that thought.

  As she pondered this, she realized it wasn’t precisely true. Yes, she’d never be here, in this castle, with these people again. But perhaps the joy she felt came from being fully present, being immersed in the experience. She smiled to herself. She had no choice. Nothing kept one in the present quite as much as immobility.

  She stroked the little head in her lap. She loved holding a sleeping child almost more than anything else. But try as she might, she couldn’t remember a time last Christmas when she simply sat and held one of her grandchildren. Her focus had been elsewhere.

  A tear slipped down her cheek. So this wasn’t all for Agnes, was it, Gertrude?

  ~ * ~

  The hour grew late and Maggie had chivied her children off to bed. When they were all kissed and tucked, she returned to the hall. Anita had been dozing off and on for the last hour. Maggie knew she needed to go to bed too.

  She crossed the hall to the fire near which the litter had been placed. Anita was awake, but weariness was overtaking her. Maggie sat next to her. “Did ye enjoy the feast?”

  Anita nodded, her eyes bright and filled with happiness.

  “I’m so glad. It has been a wonderful day—one I’ll never forget.”

  “Meee…too,” Anita answered with great effort.

  “Good. Now, I think it’s time to help ye to bed.”

  Anita nodded.

  “Logan, my love, Grandmother is tired. Will ye help me get her upstairs?”

  “Of course, sweetling.” His smile was as broad as ever, but there was sadness in his eyes. He adored Agnes. Losing her someday was inevitable but Maggie knew it didn’t make facing the loss any easier. He gently lifted the tiny body of his wizened grandmother in his arms and carried her up the stairs.

  Several serving women made to follow them, but Davina put up a hand. “Stay and enjoy the celebration. Maggie and I will help Lady Agnes to bed.”

  Logan laid his grandmother on her bed before kissing her cheek. “I love ye very much, Grandmother. Sleep well.”

  Anita smiled and squeezed his hand.

  Logan turned to Maggie. “Are ye sure ye don’t need me?”

  Davina answered. “Nay son, we can manage this.”

  “Good night, then.” He squeezed his grandmother’s hand again and left.

  When he was gone, Maggie said, “Anita, ye can feel free to speak English if ye wish. I’ll continue to speak Gaelic so Davina can understand.”

  Anita smiled with the right side of her face. “Thank you so much, Maggie. This day has truly been extraordinary.”

  “’Tis rather different than modern Christmases. Agnes’s stroke has sorely limited your ability to truly enjoy the festivities. I wish ye’d been able to experience our celebration more fully.”

  “Oh my precious girl, as odd as it sounds, I think it might have been perfect. Exactly what I needed.”

  “Ye’re kidding me.”

  “I’m not kidding. It’s all in one’s perspective. Gertrude reminded me of that when she gave me the watch. Had I not been in Agnes’s body I’d have seen it just the same as you. How could this,” she motioned to her limp left side, “be a blessing?”

  “A fair question, if ye ask me.”

  “But, from this perspective, I learned something. Being in this frail body meant that I had to be still and simply experience everything going on around me. I realized that at home, I am so focused on doing that I forget life is happening all around me. As a result, I sometimes miss what is truly important. Today I had no choice and I wouldn’t have traded a single precious moment.”

  Maggie smiled and explained what Anita had said to Davina.

  A look of wonder crossed Davina’s face. “Oh my, that’s…that’s…”

  Maggie laughed. “That’s Gertrude.”

  Anita nodded. “My thoughts exactly. I suppose my mission has been accomplished.”

  “I suppose it has been.” Maggie’s brow drew together. “I’m sure ye’re ready to return home and I know how very difficult it is for ye to be trapped in Agnes’s failing body. The remainder of the celebration will be subdued, but it’s more than enough that ye were here for Christmas Day.”

  Anita frowned. “The rest of the celebration?”

  “Aye. Unlike Christmas in our time, where everyone rushes out to take advantage of sales on the day after Christmas, here we celebrate the entire twelve days, right through to Epiphany.”

  Anita sighed. “I knew that, I guess I’d forgotten. I thought I’d only be here for a couple days.”

  “And so ye were. Ye’ve given us a great gift as it is. I won’t ask for more.”

  “No, Maggie. Now that I think about it, Gertrude asked me to stay for the ‘Christmas Season’ and I agreed. I won’t break my promise. It’s fairly clear Gertrude has a plan and maybe the mission isn’t accomplished yet. I’ll see it through. It’s just a little less than two weeks. I can do this.”

  “Are ye sure?”

  “I’m sure.”

  Maggie wasn’t sure why, but she felt a great sense of relief at that and it was more than just having Agnes present for the benefit of her family. Agnes was gone and she had accepted that and soon the family would as well. Maggie knew this wasn’t about Agnes at all. Maggie had to admit, if only to herself, she wasn’t ready for Anita to go, but she wasn’t sure why.

  Normally, it would be her inclination to try to spare someone from unnecessary suffering if she could. Anita was locked in Agnes’s failing body with all the pain and indignities that came with that. For Anita to stay twelve more days was a huge sacrifice. Maggie would never have asked it of her. Still, the fact remained that she wanted Anita to stay—just a little longer. She couldn’t exactly put her finger on why this was so important to her yet, but she was tired. She’d worry about it tomorrow.

  ~ * ~

  When Anita awoke the next day, snow was falling. Logan tried valiantly to convince his grandmother to stay in bed and rest today.

  “Naaay,” was all Anita could manage to say. She’d once read about St. Stephen’s day in a book once and knew that animals were blessed as part of the celebration. She wanted to see that. And she wanted to see the snow falling.

  Maggie laid a hand on Logan’s arm. “Logan, this is important to Grandmother. I swear, I’ll see that she takes a long rest this afternoon before tonight’s feast.”

  So once again, Anita was bundled up on her litter and carried to the church. The snow fell heavily. She had never experienced a snowfall and was surprised at the way it sounded. Noises were muted and that made sense when she thought about it. But she hadn’t expected to hear the snow falling. There was the faintest tick, tick, tick, as the tiny icy flakes landed.

  During Mass the priest blessed
hay, salt and oats. Anita would have to ask Maggie about this later. After Mass, the priest led a procession to the stables, where he blessed the horses.

  Anita smiled to herself as she watched. Maggie seemed to love the great beasts. She remembered how much Katy had loved horses as a teenager and suspected Maggie had been no different.

  When the ceremonies were over, just as she’d promised, Maggie insisted that Grandmother return to bed. “I’ll sit with ye while ye rest. ’Twill be another late night.”

  She shooed everyone else out of the room, then sat beside Anita. “I hope you don’t mind. We’ve had no time alone and I want to hear about your life and how Gertrude came to offer you the pocket watch.”

  “I’ve wondered about your story as well. But first I have a question. I gather that St. Stephen is a patron of animals.”

  “That’s right. And the blessed hay, salt and oats will be distributed to our farmers and given to sick animal through the year.”

  “I always think of St. Francis as the patron of animals.”

  Maggie laughed. “I do too, but here, St Francis is still a relatively new saint. It’s only been a little over fifty years since he died and was canonized. How crazy is that? St. Francis was eighteen when Agnes was born. And St Catherine of Siena hasn’t even been born yet. When I stop and think about things like that, it amazes me even after all these years.”

  “Tell me about yourself, I mean who you were.”

  “My name was Magdalena Mitchell. I lived near Trenton, New Jersey with my dad. He was a physics professor at Princeton.”

  “And how did you meet Gertrude?”

  “It’s a long story, but she found me sobbing in a sculpture garden on a beautiful June day.”

  “Why were you crying?”

  “The man I thought I loved had just married someone else.”

  “Oh dear. How did that happen?”

  “I won’t bore you with all the details, but I’d delayed going to school and pursuing my dreams because my mother was diagnosed with cancer when I was a senior in high school. I stayed home to help her and my family and he went on without me.”

  “Your poor mother. Were they able to treat the cancer? Did she recover?”

  A shadow of loss crossed Maggie’s face. “No. It was too advanced when she was diagnosed.”

  “I’m so very sorry, sweetheart.”

  “Thank you. I miss her. I always will.” Maggie looked pensive for a moment before continuing. “Anyway, Gertrude gave me the watch when I said I wished I could have someone else’s life. Boy was I surprised when I arrived over seven hundred years in the past.”

  “Gertrude didn’t tell you where you were coming?”

  “No. I gather she told you, because you knew about Agnes and the stroke.”

  “Yes she did. I can’t imagine the shock of landing here with no clue where or when you were.”

  “That’s putting it mildly. But it didn’t take me long to realize this is where my destiny was. I belonged here.”

  “And ye’ve been here for eleven years?”

  Maggie nodded.

  Eleven years? But Maggie said she enjoyed the Harry Potter books—plural—and only the first one had been released eleven years ago. How can that be?

  Before Anita could sort it out, Maggie said, “Tell me about yourself. Where are you from?”

  “I live in southwest Florida with my husband and I was a teacher. I used to teach sixth grade.”

  “Used to?”

  “I’m fifty-eight and I retired a couple years ago.”

  “Is that when you moved to Florida?”

  Anita laughed. “No. We’ve actually always lived in Florida.”

  “Do you have children?”

  “We have a son and a daughter. Our son is thirty. He’s married and has two daughters—three year old Lucy, and Olivia who’s one.”

  “What’s your son’s name?”

  “John James Lewis. It’s my husband’s name and was his father’s name too. My father-in-law was always called ‘John’ and my husband was ‘James’ or ‘Jim’. So when we gave our son the name, we decided to call him Jack.”

  “And your daughter?”

  “She’s twenty-seven and her name is Katy. They both live in the Washington, DC area.”

  “Why so far from home?”

  “They went to school in the northeast and that’s where they found jobs. Jack is a patent attorney and works for the US patent and trademark office. Katy has a degree in computer science from Georgetown.”

  “You’re kidding. My old boyfriend, the one I was crying about when Gertrude gave me the watch, got his computer science degree from Georgetown.”

  “Really? When did he graduate?”

  “In twenty-twelve.”

  Anita was stunned. “What did you say?”

  “He graduated in twenty-twelve.”

  “But…wait, I don’t understand. When did Gertrude give you the pocket watch?”

  “In June of twenty-fourteen.”

  Anita couldn’t get her head around it. Maggie was from farther in the future than Anita herself was. That meant…that meant Maggie hadn’t left yet in her time.

  “What’s wrong?” asked Maggie.

  “Nothing. I just assumed, since you’ve been here for more than eleven years, you used the watch more than eleven years ago.”

  “I did.”

  Anita looked at her. “No you didn’t. You haven’t used it yet. Gertrude gave me the watch in December two thousand and eight. When I go back, you’ll still be there.”

  Maggie’s mouth fell open in shock. “Two thousand eight? I never imagined…but I’m not sure why I’m surprised. Gertrude said time is not linear and she seems to pop back and forth at will.”

  “When was your mother diagnosed with cancer?”

  “Two thousand and nine.”

  “Not until next year for me. Maggie, if I find her when I go back, maybe I can talk her into getting checked out sooner. Maybe they can find it earlier and it won’t take her life.”

  For a moment Maggie just stared at Anita, stunned. Then her face lit with excitement. “You’re right. You can warn her. They could catch the cancer a year earlier and maybe…maybe…”

  The joy which seemed to have filled Maggie, dissipated as quickly as it came. Maggie shook her head sadly. “No, you can’t.”

  “Of course I could. There is a way.”

  Maggie smiled at her. “I can’t imagine what my life would have been like if she hadn’t died. Those years were incredibly hard and I miss her so much. Part of me is sorely tempted, even if only for my dad and sister. But if I’ve learned nothing else, it’s that the universe unfolds as it should. My life happened as it did for a reason and I am blissfully happy here. I’m not even sure you even could change it if you tried. I know this may seem crazy to you, but my mother’s illness and everything surrounding it has already happened. Even though two thousand and nine is your future, it’s my past. And then there’s always the chance that attempting to change even the smallest thing could make the entire situation worse. As hard as those years were, I made it through them and landed here. This is my life now. I wouldn’t change it for anything.”

  Anita nodded. “I guess I understand. As a mother, it breaks my heart to know what’s ahead for your younger self. I wish I could do something for you, even if just to make things easier somehow, but I understand.”

  “Thank you, Anita.” Maggie took hold of Anita’s hands, giving her a thoughtful look. “But maybe there is something you can do to help me after all. I have a past that I can’t share with my present and a present that I can’t share with my past.”

  “I’m not sure I understand.”

  “As I told ye no one but Logan and Davina know I’m a time-traveler. I will never be able to tell my children about their grandparents or their Aunt Paige. I can’t tell them stories from my childhood or any fond memories.”

  “Ah, I understand, a past you can’t share with your present. And you can’t share your new family with your old one.”

  “Exactly. But maybe you can. I used the pocket watch on the twenty-first of June, two thousand fourteen. Maybe someday, after that date, you can look up my sister, Paige. I did tell her about the Pocket Watch before I left and she knows who Gertrude is. She’ll believe you. You can tell her all about my life here. Tell her about my children, my husband, Davina and Agnes, and my clan. Tell her how much I love and miss her but also how very happy I am.”